Sibling Rivalry

My sister is an aspiring actress.  She's been at it ever since she was chosen out of 300+ kids to play a role in Lethal Weapon 4.  She even has an IMDB page. Check it out here. Feel free to leave a reply about how cool she is.  

So the other thing about my sister is that she is fiercely family-oriented.  She would do anything for us.  So thoughtful her found me going through my quarter-life crisis and said, "hey... why don't I recommend my sister to my agency and see if they'll like her and take her?"

So I talked on the phone with her agents and managers for a while one morning.  They expressed concern that we were too close in age and looks and worried that we would compete against each other for roles.  

As much as I love acting, I know that this wouldn't be the right career path for me to take.  My sis on the other hand, is passionate and good at it.  There's not a doubt in my mind that she's going to be a star.  

So that's exactly what I told her representation.  They should meet with me and if they like me and feel I'm right for their company, take me.  If they think I'm too similar to my sis, don't worry about it.  I'll walk away.  No hard feelings, I'll focus on writing, journalism, food photography, television development or one of the other millions of things I want to do.

This got me thinking, though.  There are plenty of celeb siblings in Hollywood.  Some are more successful than the other.  Let's take a look at some of my most favorite ones (plus or minus a few) and in the Battle of the Older vs. Younger Siblings, who comes out on top?

John and Joan Cusack

He stole my heart when he lifted that boombox up over his shoulders in "Say Anything..." With his boyish charms untainted by time, Cusack is the epitome of the Everyman (even when donning his creepy black trench coat).  His big sis, Joan Cusack, however always irked me a little because she consistently plays these uptight women who always scrunches her face up and is forever yelling and freaking out.  I may be in the minority on my opinion of Joan, though, because she has been nominated for the Academy Awards twice while John has yet to score a nod (a travesty, I say). But who's headlining films while the other is mostly known as, "hey that woman in that one movie!?"  Guess it just goes with the well-known notion that Oscar nods don't mean blockbuster hits.

Therefore...  1 point for the younger bro! Just watch Say Anything..., and then if you still don't get it, watch Serendipity and if you still don't feel anything, America's Sweethearts and if you're still unmoved, you're heartless.

Oldies: 0 Young 'uns: 1

Maggie and Jake Gyllenhaal

Jake wins. Need I say anything more? Yea, I didn't think so.

Oldies: 0 Young 'uns: 2

Warren Beatty and Shirley Maclaine

I was surprised when I first found out they were siblings too. Each one has become such a huge star in their own right, her for classics like, "Terms of Endearment" and "Steel Magnolias" and him with "Dick Tracy," "Bonnie and Clyde" and just being an all-around sexy man.  

"There's no way Warren and I wouldn't become stars. It was bred into us by parents who were in competition with each other. One was driven to believe in success. The other was afraid of it." - Shirley Maclaine

I say...let's hear it for both of them.  They're Shirley Maclaine and Warren Beatty, for goodness sakes!

Oldies: 1 Young 'uns: 3

Jamie Lynn and Britney Spears

Big sister Britney started raking in the dough when she danced her way through the Mickey Mouse Club.  She then climbed to pop royalty with "Hit Me Baby One More Time" and has since remained one of the most fascinating American pop culture figures.  There was that whole mess of two years what with the rehab and all but at the end of the day, people are still rooting for her to succeed, find happiness and stay healthy.  Britney's fame allowed the younger (but much older-looking) Jamie Lynn to star in her own Nickelodeon show, "Zoey 101," which was doing pretty well until...she got pregnant. At age 16.

Who's the winner?  Of course it's Britney, bitch! 

Oldies: 2 Young 'uns: 3

Ashlee and Jessica Simpson

Say what you will about Ashlee and Jessica Simpson but I like the two of them!  Jessica's got more of that All-American gal thing going on with the hair and the boobs.  But she was super endearing in The Newlyweds (you call it annoying, I call it endearing. You call chicken, she calls tuna.)  and girl's got the lungs of a mammoth (I just googled, "animal with big lungs" and that's what they gave me. How'd you like them apples?)  My favorite is younger sis, Ashlee, however. Her music is dancey and less snoozy than her big sis' and she also had her own reality show, "The Ashlee Simpson Show" where she demonstrated to the world just how delightfully kooky she is.  That's my kind of girl!

Oldies: 2 Young 'uns: 4

Julia and Eric Roberts

One is America's sweetheart and the other always gets stuck playing creepy guys in Lifetime movies.  I think it's pretty undeniable that although Eric Roberts has made a decent career out of acting, his little sister, Julia has pretty much got him beat.  When Rourke was receiving his Independent Spirit Award this year for his role in "The Wrestler," he kept asking people in the audience to hire his buddy, Eric.  Not that Eric is unemployed or anything, but many just felt that he is far more talented that the roles he's relegated to. I haven't seen enough of his stuff, to be honest but I do feel that younger sister, Julia Roberts is quite overrated.  She was just very smart and wise in her career choices and got pretty lucky.  Nonetheless, money and fame talks and she's still doing better than her big bro.

Oldies: 2 Youn 'uns: 5

Hmm..looks like it's just not in the "stars" for me to become an actress!  Break a leg, Jess. =)