The superlative is my best friend. Why say, "you are a good friend" when you can say, "you are the best friend EVER!" or, "I didn't like that cookie" when you can say, "that was the most disgusting thing I have ever tasted in my life EVER" or, "I love you" when you can say, "I love you to death...EVER"?

But believe when I say I am not exaggerating this next sentence.

I just came back from the worst interview of my life EVER.

She is a prominent employer for a big-time system. She is a rule-breaker, ball buster, boundary crosser. Maybe I was a little intimated today? I never really get that nervous from interviews but today I was quite jittery. Somehow, I got it into my head that I wasn't qualified enough for the position and the rest of my answers came out sounding that way. The interview started off pretty well but when I looked over at her while I was talking, each time, she would have this not amused face on. So I started to get more nervous and when I get nervous, I crack jokes to ease the tension.

That did not help.

She still looked unamused so I soldiered on, saying things that as soon as the words were out of my mouth, I wanted to snatch back.

In the end, I walked away feeling like my previous work experience made me unqualified, fluffy and too soft for the position. It would not have been the case if I had been wiser with my answers, highlighting traits that would help with the position but I felt like I just sounded like I was explaining all the reasons why I actually wouldn't be a good fit, which Job Hunting 101 (yes, I'm still taking that prereq) has taught us you never should do.

Nothing really dramatic happened at the interview, there were no tears shed, F-bombs accidentally dropped, or punches thrown. I just walked away with this uncomfortable feeling in the pit of my stomach, thinking, "that person that was in there is not who I am, that was not the best way I can present myself."

I wanted to go home, dig a hole in my couch and crawl in there with a bowl of Helen's mac & cheese in hand but I decided life is too short to wallow. Move on. So things didn't go your way. Get over it.

Instead I did some writing, read over what I wrote, and smiled to myself, thinking,"I enjoyed that."

I believe that writing just may be the best medicine EVER.

*Edit: Never mind, I just ate a slice of peach pie. That was the best medicine EVER.

The Face of FUNemployment

My friend and I are talking on the phone one day, telling each other, "we have to catch up! We have to go grab dinner! We do! We do!" but we haven't (in a year!) yet. And then my friend (aka "shorty" 'cause he my homeboy and totally not because he is vertically-challenged) says, "I want to hear all about your life. It sounds so great."

Me: Err...what? In what ways?
Shorty: You know, it's outside the corporate world.
Me: You mean, like, unemployed?
Shorty: No. There are two types of unemployed. One is unemployed and the other is FUNemployed. You're the latter.

What exactly does FUNemployment look like? Let's take a look...

And so much more. Tears and laughter with mommy (and daddy) dearest. Working out parts of my body I didn't even know existed. Hurrying to my car so I can drive and listen to Ira Glass on podcast. Prayers. Prayers. Prayers. Just because I don't have a full-time job right now doesn't mean I'm going to be moping at home waiting for the days to go by. This time is here for a reason and I'm going to make damn sure I spend it well.

How would you spend your FUNemployment time? Looking for a job? That's so passe. (Joking, please hire me.)

Ready, Set, Go!

After nearly a month and a half of being "funemployed" (and lemme tell ya, it sure was fun), I'm slowly starting to buckle up and crawl my way to my career goals.

Today, I readied my first batch of hard copied applications to be sent to four (very lucky) news stations in America. Though I've already applied to a couple stations on-line, it's always best to also mail applications in, especially when dealing with reels and what not.

Whewph, the hard copied applications took quite a bit of time to prepare! Much like cooking, you have to get all the ingredients ready, prep it, let it simmer and wait for the results.

After spending over $70 on office supplies (printer ink costs a pretty penny), I was ready for the prep. I think after awhile, the applications will be quicker to send out because I'll have adopted an assembly-line-styled system. Then, news stations all over America, watch out! I'm coming for ya!

Working...

Since quitting my job, I have been keeping myself preoccupied with an abundance of activities. Ballroom dancing (finally got my dance shoes, yay!), gym (muscles shown upon request), job hunting, chinese learning, family bonding, website-building, Jesus-learning, the list goes on and on.

The past month has taken me on some pretty interesting adventures.

I was this close to getting a job with a top-notch, He Who Must Not Be Named celebrity gossip website. I got asked to be on TV twice, once for Extra and once for a Korean Home Shopping Network, both of which I happily obliged (hey, gotta practice that anchor voice somewhere), I was almost going to tutor the child of one of the richest families in show biz (and that's... pretty rich), I have 90% of Guang Liang's beautiful song, Tong Hua memorized, and there are more projects coming but I'd rather disclose them at a later time.

Yet, none of these things brought home any bread for my family and shoes for my (imaginary) children. None of them qualified me as contributing to the society.

Oh--one did. A little. I freelanced. I freelanced as a journalist for KoreAm Journal and Audrey Magazine.

This is where I worked...

...Okay, so no. I didn't exactly work at the famous CAA building in Century City.
More like I worked in the amazing park outside the building. Nicknamed the "Savannah" by my working galpal, the savannah is by far the prettiest park this side of town (save for the Getty) and a completely zen and tranquil location to get some writing done.

I wrote about events I went to, people I spoke with, things I saw. All of which shall be published in the upcoming weeks and which I PROMISE YOU I shall upload to this blog soon. (In fact, just made an appointment to go into the office next week to get digital copies of my work so stop fidgeting impatiently already!)

But something I don't really get to write about in those articles, but which I do get to do plenty here, are what I learned from the events I went to, people I spoke with and things I saw.

what I learned:

I learned about the precarious nature of balancing being an artist and a "celebrity" from Linkin Park and Fort Minor frontman, Mike Shinoda. I had always been aware about the dangers of fame and the blurriness of mixing art with commerce but with the recent temptation of almost working for that famous celebrity blog, I almost tossed out my morals and personal beliefs just so I can receive a regular paycheck every month. Well, not tossed out exactly, but altered it drastically. That was a big NO-NO and I have Mike Shinoda (and JCrisman) to thank for reminding me that.

I also got to check out some of his awesome artwork. His exhibition Glorious Excess (Dies) runs at the Japanese American National Museum in Little Tokyo, LA until early October.

I was humbled and inspired to learn of White on Rice actress Lynn Chen's battle with eating disorders. As a former fat kid, most of my life consisted of fad diets and exercise regimes, overreating and complaints about my figure. I would always distastefully joke that I didn't have enough will power to develop a eating disorder but deep down, I knew that I do have one, as small as it might be.

The fact that Chen, as opposed to other actors and actresses who make remarks like, "oh, I had anorexia, like, five years ago" or the even worse, "I eat whatever I want. I'm just naturally skinny," is so open about her battle with anorexia and bulimia and has even taken to blogging about it to combat her addictions is admirable. It also gives me hope that not everything and everyone in Hollywood is as awful as my jaded view of the business might assume.

There are more. There were weddings and cute boys and "society girls" bonding time and oh yea --the realization that as amazing, free-ing and nourished I feel when I write and report, I don't think I could ever become a professional/full-time freelancer.

I would write for free if I could afford to but my parents don't really dig the idea of their college grad eldest daughter lounging around in pajamas, laptop permanently attached to her wrists.

So let's wait and see what else is in store for me...

Thanks Liz for the Shinoda and Chen snapshots!

First One In

Just went in for my first "real job" interview.

Was called a "force of nature."

Not sure what this means but we'll find out soon enough!

Gahh...it boggles my mind to think that I may be employed in two weeks. Didn't I just graduate last week?