Creep

This cracked me up for the most part of my day.

I've been looking to buy www.jessicajann.com and www.janicejann.com so the Jann sisters can begin our global web domination.

Well, turns out Jess' name has already been purchased by a third party who probably spends a lot of time buying domain names of actors who pop up on IMDB because those are the ones who'll eventually need their domain names to start websites with. (Smart!)

When I emailed him asking how much he was willing to sell www.jessicajann.com for, he responded with the following email:

Make me an offer. Are you related to the Jessica Jann that is listed on imdb.com who appeared on iCarly? If so, the price would be cheaper if there is an autographed photo of Jessica included in the deal. That would be a nice addition to my collection.

I had a field day reading that! Which I did. Out loud. About 500 times. In different accents.

I especially like the last line, it's extra creepy.

PS. Trying to build own website! Anyone have tips/tutorials or would like to just volunteer to make it for me?

I Always Knew I'd Be On CNN Someday...

The Curious Case of Gwen Stefani's Abs

There are a few concerts that I need to watch in my lifetime:

1. Justin Timberlake: Need to get my "Sexyback."
2. Janet Jackson: Homegirl can dance.
3. Black Eyed Peas: Cross that off the list. Thanks CeCe Jie. :)
4. No Doubt. <<<<

This is the Cricket Wireless Ampitheatre. A few Coyotes and I headed down south to Chula Vista, San Diego after scoring some amazing $20.00 to see Gwen Stefani & Co. yell, "Hey Baby," to us.
Yea, yea. No Doubt rocked. They played all the awesome oldies. They had an awesome stage. They looked great. But in all honesty, Gwen's abs stole the show.
Want a closer look?
We were mesmerized. We were entranced. We were captivated. How can you be 39-year old, have two kids and look like that?

My personal theory is that she's an alien robot.

Anyway, after the show, we decided to try our own No Doubt moves.
And jam to our own No Doubt beat.
Next step: cloning Stefani's abs.

You Never Forget Your First

I celebrated my first paycheck with a haircut!

*Just so some of you don't get confused by the chronology of the posts, this was a couple of weeks ago...

I'm Such a Jezebel

Comments, critiques, laughs welcomed below.

PS. Conversation with the sister...

Me: Oh crap, I totally forgot that I'm going to be unleashing my number and email to the world.
Sis: No! You can't do that!

The computer screen flashes my number and email in the Youtube video

Me: Too late.
Sis: You're going to get all these stalkers!
Me: But other anchors put their contact information on their Youtube reels
Sis: But they're not pretty!

She has a point.

Bill Clinton Brings Arrested Journalists Home from North Korea

Twitter delivered me the best news I have heard in days: North Korea has pardoned and released Laura Ling and Euna Lee!

Ling, 32 and Lee, 36 were arrested in March while reporting undercover near the borders of the communist country, under the dictatorship of Kim Jong Il.  The pair was sentenced to 12 years of hard labor by the North Korean government in June.  While their tragic arrest stirred the hearts of many, the media coverage of the incident was less than influential. I'll bet walking out to the streets right now, most of the people you ask would not even know who Laura and Euna are.

Nevertheless, our government and our hero of the hour by the name of Bill Clinton finally stepped in and took action.  According to CNN, the former president "met with top North Korean officials in Pyongyang to appeal for the release of Laura Ling and Euna Lee."

For more, read the CNN Wire blog here.

Awesome day, awesome day. I wish I were still at Koream so I could help craft a feature for this news.  Nonetheless, I thank God for the return of these two journalists, who can now go home to their young families (Laura is married, Euna is married with a four-year old daughter).

And now, it is not so tasteless to post up a picture of Laura's hoooot husband, Iain Clayton.

I know, RIGHT? And they're even cuter together to boot.

The Power of a Nap

The sandman is a flirty little fella.

And he loves seducing me. He lures me in at all hours of the day and begs me to fall into him. I try to resist, I really do. I say, "no no, not right now." Or, "I can't." Or, "you better stop that or I'm calling your mother!" I tell him now is not a good time. People will see, they will judge. They might even laugh at me. But his embrace is far too strong, his kisses way too magnetic. I do what I can to take my mind off him but somehow, he always manages to creep back into my consciousness and dance into my radar.

I am only a weak, mere mortal. I make mistakes. I sin. So I nap.

Once I found out that my one-hour lunch break was far too short to go to a sit-down restaurant, far too long to eat a sack lunch, far too hot to walk around the Beverly Hills residence, and far too cold to stay in the office, I found the perfect activity to spend the remaining minutes after having gobbled up my ham sandwich.

Lo and behold, the makings of a power nap.

I usually doze off for about 30 minutes each day and wake up (at first) feeling groggy and pissed off and (later) alert and rejuvenated. Here is how you can recreate my amazing auto-power-nap experience:

1) Pillows.

People think that they can make do with just sleeping under their arms or lying flat on their backs but let this pro tell you, pillows are a NECESSITY to a delicious power nap. They add the extra oomph and keep your poor neck from feeling stiff. They're comfy and remind you of that other place in your bedroom at home which you (hopefully) blissfully slumber into the night each day. I took old cushions from my home and wrapped them in t-shirts to prevent developing creases on my face when I woke up. Feel free to do likewise.

2) Lighting.

I'm lucky because my garage is underground and fairly cool but for those of you out there that must succumb to parking under the sun, a nice shaded area is recommended. This is so you won't wake up all sweaty and gross, and also so that you will... actually wake up and not have died from heat stroke or something.

3) Air circulation

Please please please roll your windows down when you sleep so you don't end up like some poor babies whose parents left them in the car and they suffocated to death. I know it's rather worrisome to have it rolled when you know you will be unconscious while other people might possibly be passing by your car but just think of it as napping on a park bench or at the school library. There are no windows separating you from the world there, are there?

4) A cell phone alarm

It is pretty vital that you wake up on time so that you can go back to work and make your boss a happy man/woman.

5) Enjoyment

Please enjoy the powers of a power nap. Notice how much brighter the world looks after you have one. Thank the heavens for these small pleasures in life. This is the best thing you will get out of taking one. If you just wake up and cry and complain about how you wasted your lunch break sleeping, then I'm afraid this is not for you. You can read a book or something lame like that. (Just kidding, I read books all the time at work but I seem to always lose concentration during lunchtime. Sandman's hold on me is strong.)

Nap on.